


The morning commute

by orphan_account



Series: Merthur Drabbles [8]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Copious Amounts Of Swearing, Fluff, Funny, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-23
Updated: 2015-08-23
Packaged: 2018-04-16 18:10:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4635165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin is stuck behind a train when another man pulls up and starts an expletive-laden tirade at it. Rated T for lots of swears and mentions of the act of bestiality.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The morning commute

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: there’s a long ass train and we’ve been waiting for it to pass for twenty minutes and you’re leaning out of the window of your car yelling at it so i’ll make some polite conversation au

Merlin gripped the wheel of his Pinto until his knuckles turned even whiter than usual.It was eight-thirty in the morning, and he was already at his wit’s end.

 

The worst bit wasn’t  that he’d overslept, or the coffee machine broke, or the “check engine” light was flashing at him in a rather smug fashion. It was the slow-moving cargo train that had been blocking his path for the past twenty minutes.

 

“Oh, come _on_ ,” he moaned as yet another car full of sheep passed by, their placid expressions seeming far too self-satisfied for his liking. He glared at them as they came to a halt in his path, chewing their cud as if they weren’t blocking a road full of increasingly irate commuters.

 

Merlin started as somebody honked their horn next to him, rolling down their window.

 

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me! Fucking sheep, get yourselves and your fucking wool moving!” His mouth twitching upwards in a smile, Merlin turned to look at his fellow commuter.

 

The man who was currently leaning out of his car window was blond. Merlin gulped. He’d always had a thing for blondes, and this man was no exception. It certainly didn’t help that he was very well built and had eyes such a clear shade of blue that the overcast sky must have been jealous.

 

 _OK, Merls_ , Merlin told himself. _Just act cool. Be...natural_. He snorted at his own pep talk. Like he could ever be successful in chatting up the man next to him. God knew he hadn’t had any success at all lately. Letting out a whoosh of breath, Merlin rolled down the window, plastering on his most charming grin.

 

“Are you late for work too?” He called, trying to appear friendly. The other man paused midway through another profanity-laden tirade (something about unleashing a load of Welshmen on the cargo train), turning to look at the source of the query.

 

“Yeah,” he replied, “my sister’s gonna kill me.”

 

“You work for your sister?” Merlin asked, raising his eyebrows. This man certainly didn’t look like the type to take orders. More like somebody who enjoyed issuing them, in fact. Merlin quashed that thought before it could go in any unfortunate directions.

 

“With,” corrected the other man indignantly. “She’s HR, I’m CFO. I was supposed to do a presentation today, but now…” He gestured at the train helplessly. “I’m rather screwed.”

 

“I’m Welsh,” interjected Merlin, immediately mentally kicking himself. The other man’s brow wrinkled in confusion. “Just - the last thing you were shouting. That was a bit unfair.” God, him and his big mouth. His mother had always warned him it could lead to trouble. “The penalty for having...well...y’know...with a sheep was a lot less than stealing one, so sheep thieves would say they just...uhm...to avoid getting their hands chopped off.” Merlin finally managed to close his mouth, cringing internally. He turned to study the train in front of him, holding the gaze of a sheep as it slowly moved away from him. To Merlin’s surprise, he heard a laugh from the blond man.

 

Turning to look cautiously, he saw his newfound friend nearly doubled over his steering column, gasping with laughter.

 

“Well, that’s a hell of a way to introduce yourself,” he chuckled. “Make many friends that way?”

 

“Not really,” Merlin replied. “Then again, they also have the option of leaving.”

 

“Fair enough,” the other man conceded. “What’s your name?”

 

“Merlin Emrys,” offered Merlin, giving him a half wave. “I’d shake your hand, but you’re a bit far away.”

 

“Arthur Pendragon,” replied the blond. “Pleased to meet you.”

 

“Soooooooo….” Merlin said. “...How are you?” Once more, he cursed his brain for its habit of turning into a pile of mush whenever attractive men appeared.

 

“Well, I’m feeling just absolutely peachy about being stuck behind this BLOODY ENORMOUS TRAIN!!!!” Arthur yelled out the window, flipping the V’s at it. The sheep didn’t care. Merlin snorted in amusement.

 

“Yeah, it’s...big,” He offered lamely. _Oh God, the implications..._ Merlin prayed that the car seat would spontaneously eat him and he wouldn’t embarrass himself any more. However, Arthur only laughed again.

 

“That it is,” he chuckled. “Tell me, Merlin, you like big trains?”

 

Merlin gaped at his neighbor’s smirking face. “We’ve been sitting in traffic for twenty minutes while you curse at a trainload of sheep, and you want to _flirt_ with me? I might not even be gay!”

 

“Your rainbow bumper sticker says otherwise,” Arthur pointed out, eyebrow raised. Merlin sunk lower in his seat.

 

“Be that as it may, the question still remains, why on God’s green Earth would _you_ flirt with _me_?”

 

Arthur shrugged. “Because you’re cute, I think you’re funny, and I project a false air of confidence to hide my lingering insecurities over my sexual identity. At least that’s what Morgana tells me.”

 

“I can tell,” deadpanned Merlin, still somewhat in shock. His ears must be bright red by now. But as he looked in Arthur’s direction once more, he could see the end of the train approaching.

 

“Oh, the train’s almost gone!” He cried in relief.

 

“Damn!” Arthur cursed. “Give me your number, quick!”

 

“What?”

 

“Just do it, you clotpole!”

 

Merlin rattled off his number just as the barrier lifted. With a collective sigh of relief, the commuters began to move forward, Merlin and Arthur among them. Arthur gave him a cheeky wave goodbye as he turned left, which Merlin happily returned. He spent the rest of the drive in  a mild stupor, still unwilling to believe the turn his luck had taken.

 

When he arrived at work, Merlin’s phone buzzed. He had a text from an unknown number that read: _I’m done at 5 2nite, want to go to the Rising Sun and talk about trains? ;) -AP_

  
“Unbelievable,” muttered Merlin, shaking his head, but his face twitched into a grin once more. He typed, _Is 7 OK?_ and pressed send, watching the message pop up on the screen.

 

 _Sounds_ _great_ , came the reply. _C U then._ Merlin saved the contact as "That prat from the train," then stowed his phone. Noticing his grin, Merlin's colleague Freya nudged him on the shoulder.

 

"Looks like you had a good drive," she teased. "Can I count on you sneaking out early?"

 

"Oh yes," Merlin grinned. "It seems my luck's taking a turn for the better."


End file.
